Friday: Yaye, jeans day! Even as a professional adult with a fun wardrobe of business casual attire and a love of clothes other than jeans, it is still exciting to wear jeans to the office. Cute flats, nice top, skinny jeans, accessories, and out the door. Friday is a great day!!
Catch up on loose ends at work, lunch out with my office girlfriends at the Thai place that serves lunch in the little boats, and an easy afternoon. Love my job, love my co-workers, ready for the weekend!
Saturday: Husband is working, kids are with their mother. I wake, play with the dogs, enjoy multiple cups of coffee in a quiet house. Read magazines, tidy up a little, play with dogs some more, pedicure, eyebrow wax, quick stop at Walgreens, and back home. Do laundry and then lose inspiration to put it away. Will do that Sunday. Text friends, spend time on Facebook, watch The Style Network and go to bed. Lazy, lazy day!
Sunday: Husband arrives home. After five years I am still elated to see him.I love him more than anything on this earth, along with our pup who is more a part of us than a separate entity. I run to give him a huge hug, kiss, and then keep dogs quiet while he naps. The dogs are just as elated to see him as I am. Kongs keep them quiet for an hour and a half.
Shower, dress, head to brunch with husband. After brunch, we head to the home improvement store to purchase items for some yard improvements as well as a new screen door. Spend way too much on bricks, trees, and door. I am excited to finally up our curb appeal except that the 6 trees we bought on a whim have removed the possibility of a motorcycle ride from our afternoon as he wants to get them in the ground asap.
Do more laundry while he plants trees. Fold laundry but will put away later that night along with the clothes from yesterday. Later that night we order pizza, watch The Hangover 2, snuggle sans kids, and play with our dogs. Don’t touch laundry. Who cares? We are in love, more so every day over the last five years. I am happy. I am content. I am head over heels in love with the life that we have built. As much as I love the kids it is so special to get time just the two of us.
Monday: Morning coffee, dogs quietly chewing on new moose antlers. Shower, dress. Outfit sucks. Dress again. Second outfit sucks. Throw discarded tops on the bed. Husband still sleeping. Next outfit sucks. My wardrobe sucks. I hate my job. I hate my clothes. I hate my shoes. I am sweaty and running late. I want to get back into bed and snuggle up to my big sturdy man. Finally choose outfit. Oh wait, this one is good. Love fashion! Love shoes! Love being able to dress cute to go to work! I am riding a roller coaster of fashion every morning.
Manage to find focus and work on great project. Work is great. Love, love, love my job! Husband calls, going to take us to dinner with kids to celebrate end of school year. Yaye, love going out to dinner. Already wearing cute outfit so I’m ready to go!!
Traffic is backed up the entire length of the expressway on the way home. I hate this. How do I live like this? My job sucks, or at least the fact that it is 25 suburban miles from home sucks. Must be another way. I am miserable. I call my friend who is works as a writer/editor and does contract work and is entirely home based. I want that. I need that. Friend gives great links and advice. Can’t wait to get home and start looking into this. I need this NOW.
Arrive home, everyone is waiting to go to dinner. They are all sitting in family room watching TV. Dishes are in the sink, dishwasher still clean and full. Stuff is everywhere. Apparently these are my jobs? They’ve gotten my Jerseygirl up and ready to yell. No wonder the stepmoms in fairy tales were nasty bitches. Don’t worry, I’ll do it after we go out to dinner instead of looking at those links my friend mentioned. No problem. I am going for the martyr. I am not proud of it but I am too angry to care.
Dinner is fun. Nice to all be together, I am finally relaxed. Great conversation with the kids. Life is good. I love them! Who cares about the yucky mess in the sink at home or the laundry that I still have not put away. My family is amazing!!
Tuesday: Puppy wakes me up before my alarm. Sweet boy, I love his puppy kisses to get me out of bed. Wake kids up to go with their mother. This happens every third day. I let the dogs out, throw the ball a few times, feed them, fresh water. I love taking care of my furry babies. They round out our family and are “my” kids with my husband.
Go to work. Traffic is ok but each week I arrive at our weekly departmental meeting within seconds of being on-time. Go straight to meeting with purse and Starbucks cup in hand. Spend most of the day preparing my weekly spreadsheet. Ugh, this is the worst. I review essentially the same data week after week after week after week. Anything in Excel is torture for me. I procrastinate, looking at Yahoo, the cafeteria menu, Facebook, Gmail, read my work related Google alerts. There has to be someone who can do this awful mindless task other than me! I am in the wrong job when it comes to this. I stare at the screen thinking about my friend’s advice. I am a writer, not a spreadsheeter. I have so many other things to do and I am stuck on this one heinous task. I put in headphones, stream Disney Park Hopper radio, and finally push through the task.
Rush home from work, feed dogs. I am on my own tonight but Jax and I have doggie class. After a full day in their crates they are nuts even though the pet sitter has come for a half hour in the middle of the day. Spend half hour letting them get their energy out, feed them, and then get the puppy ready for school. Harness, treats, water bottle, purse. I need a special doggie travel bag. He is working on his B.A. for the Canine Life and Social Skills program.
Class is interesting. I’ve learned so much from our dog obedience school. Jax enters the room like a frat boy entering a party with a case of beer. He tries to drag me to the two yellow lab pups in the room. He loves yellow labs and Golden Retrievers. I wonder if it’s because his mother is yellow. Ten minutes later I have his attention and he is ready to learn. He is a brilliant boy!
Wednesday: Normal morning routine. Husband arrives home from work while I am in battle with closet. I am standing in my closet in undergarments and a skirt. Choose top, look in mirror. Oh, hell no! Pull off top, throw onto bed. Choose another top. Ugh, NO! Repeat process. I have nothing to wear!!! Amused husband peers around corner of closet. My side is bursting at the seams and I had to recently purchase more hangers. Everything is arranged by color according to the J.C. Penney color chart that I learned back in college when I worked part-time for them. “Really??” he asks, teasing me. I love him!!! Finally choose boring plain top and lame necklace. At least I am dressed. I have sweat on my upper lip and I’m 10 minutes late. But I have clothes on my body.
Arrive home after work, husband and stepson have spent the day cleaning out last year’s mulch and building our new garden wall. He is an amazing man and such a hard worker!!! God, I love him!!! The wall looks great, trees are watered. He works so hard to make our home more beautiful. Inside I find that thekitchen sink is empty and the dishwasher ready for the dirty dishes of dinner. My oldest stepdaughter is reading on the sofa. She is the one who emptied and refilled it and I am so grateful for such a small thing!
Thursday: Today is a tremendous day! After several summers in a row of talking ourselves out of it we are finally having a swimming pool installed!!! I don’t know if it is because I am a Pisces or because I grew up on a lake and come from water-loving parents, but I love the water. I love laying in a raft and reading a book. I love swimming and feeling my muscles move me through the water. I love practicing the different strokes.I love swimming up into my husband’s arms and knowing that I don’t weigh much in the water. I love simply gliding through the water and feeling the smooth freshness passing over my skin.
In addition to pool installation day it is also my weekly day to work from home. I wake at my normal time, make coffee, play with puppies, and sit down to watch the news for an hour. I shower, do a leave-in conditioner and slather myself with anti-aging products sans makeup. Skip drying my hair and toss on shorts and a tank top. I am more ready to work on Thursdays than any other day of the week!!
Around noon the doorbell rings. The pool installers are here!!!!! My husband goes to talk to them and will ultimately spend the rest of the afternoon supervising their work from a subtle distance. He is beyond-handy and could build us a house from the bottom up, but for something like this he is leaving the installation to the experts.
I spend the afternoon working on our departmental newsletter that I have recently revamped and rebranded. It is the part of my job I love and wish I could do full-time, particularly from the comfort of my dining room/office. Every now and then I glance out at the pool going up. First the leveling of the ground, then the outside walls, sand, liner, pump and filter, and final touches. I leave my computer. WE HAVE A POOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I run into the living room where the kids are hanging out. I jump up and down yelling WE HAVE A POOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They look at me like I’ve lost my mind and giggle along with me. “Do we have a pool?” my thirteen year old stepson asks. I love it that they are getting our sense of humor.
I run outside to survey the pool. My husband already has both garden hoses spilling fresh clear water into the beautiful blue lining. I want to jump in but the water is only an inch deep. The other day I laid down in the puppy pool while my neighbors floated on their rafts on a 95 degree day. I am happy to be in the swimming pool club.
Friday: Another jeans day. The pool is 3/4 of the way full. Today is payday!! Payday = swimming pools! I love my job on payday. Love it when I get to write. Love it when I get to work from home. Hate it when I am on the highway 10 hours a week. I’ve done the math and that commute equals twenty days of my life. Twenty days. Over eight years puts it at 160 days, or nearly half a year just sitting in the car racing down the highway. In ten more years that year in the car will be a reality. Imagine spending a year continually in your car driving down the road. The idea is preposterous.
This is my struggle. Payday is necessary and it often brings perks like swimming pools or a wardrobe of unsuitable clothes. It also brings security and the things we need to live. And so I am mentally back to my constant struggle. At what point does paying for your life interrupt your life. At what point does working to live become living to work. I do not have the answers but I think I am getting closer. In the meantime I am going to jump into my pool.